Film Diary: Lady Bird (2017)
Growing up brings numerous challenges - challenges ranging from the downfall of a close friendship to an uncertain parental relationship that may seem to be in a constant state of distress. Greta Gerwig's 2017 film Lady Bird illustrates the stress of change, the transition from childhood to adulthood, and the tumultuous relationship between a mother and her daughter.
I originally saw Lady Bird during June of 2020. Just as Lady Bird felt caged in throughout the film, I desperately wanted to escape the trap COVID had placed on the world and dreamed of going to college normally. Now that I'm a freshman in college, I wanted to see if my views of the film had changed. This time around, I am more distraught and weary of how many viewers see this movie’s mother-daughter relationship as typical rather than unhealthy.
Having grown up in Sacramento, California, Christine "Lady Bird'' McPherson (Saoirse Ronan) yearns to break ties with her home state by attending college in the Northeast. Despite the apprehension this brings her parents, Lady Bird insists on breaking away from her past to "go where culture is."
Christine's stringent relationship with her mother, Marion McPherson (Laurie Metcalf), is visible from the film's opening sequence; after her mother rejects her idea of attending college in New York, Lady Bird decides to jump out of their moving car.
This impulsive attitude is illustrated during Lady Bird's time at school. Despite not being a great student, she immerses herself in drama club with her best friend, Julie (Beanie Feldstein), and future boyfriend, Danny O'Neill (Lucas Hedges). For Lady Bird, everything seems fine at the beginning of senior year, with admission to a college in New York being a strenuous but inevitable feat.
Lady Bird's outlook on trust and love quickly shifts once she unexpectedly discovers that Danny is gay. Feeling betrayed by her first love, Christine distances herself from the drama club and attempts to fit in with people she perceives as more worthy of her attention.
For almost half of the movie, Lady Bird must grapple with attempting to please her parents while simultaneously becoming someone she is not. We see her distance herself from previous friendships in favor of exclusive groups to pretend she is from an economically stable background.
As the film progresses, Lady Bird becomes increasingly self aware of how she presents herself to her peers, and ventures to create an identity separate from that of her family.
Furthermore, she becomes enthralled by the idea of rejecting her parents’ authority by dating guys she clearly does not like, but those who will improve her social mobility.
After meeting Kyle (Timothee Chalamet) at a coffee shop, Lady Bird begins to date him but, again, as in her other romantic relationship, eventually distances herself from him after finding out that she was the only one in the relationship coming in as a virgin.
There is a constant struggle between finding love and staying true to oneself when it seems like everyone else is maturing much faster and discovering their identity.
As Christine begins to distance herself from her parents, she creates a falsified identity where those truly closest to her cannot explain to her the problems associated with an insincere character. Instead, her obsession with finding friends and creating relationships with people to use as tools creates a rift in her connection with her parents. Lady Bird fails to consider the emotional struggles of her parents and cares more about her desire to attend an out-of-state college than spending time with her family during her last few months at home.
In a series of clips from New Year's Eve, Thanksgiving, and Christmas, Lady Bird appears happy. Here, the film fails to center the anxiety her parents were experiencing as they tried to make their daughter's wishes come true. On Christmas, Christine's dad Larry (Tracy Letts) provides her with completed financial aid papers, an act which Lady Bird sees as an expected Christmas present
The true struggle behind this act goes unrecognized. Even after finding out her father has lost his job and struggled with depression for years, Lady Bird fails to empathize. Seeing the unreciprocated care and love Mr. McPherson provided for his daughter was one of the hardest aspects of the movie. For me, Lady Bird comes off as selfish and ungrateful.
Despite these flaws, the unhealthy maternal relationship on display is not solely her fault. After Lady Bird's high school graduation, it is revealed that she had applied and was waitlisted to a college in New York.
In direct contrast to Mr. McPherson, Mrs. McPherson illustrates an eerily similar reaction that Lady Bird has when she does not get her way. Laurie proceeds to give her daughter the silent treatment and doesn't offer a proper goodbye when Lady Bird does eventually get off the waitlist and makes her way to New York.
In spite of the unwarranted anger Lady Bird feels towards her mother, the movie ends with Lady Bird leaving a voicemail telling Laurie that she loves her, despite their tumultuous past.
Ultimately, while I do resonate with certain aspects of Lady Bird's views on independence and young adulthood, I wish the film highlighted the impact Lady Bird's actions had on her parents and how this contributed to her development as a character.
Lady Bird is not going to mature because she moves away from her parents; she seems to be running away from her problems instead of facing them head-on. While the ending scene provides some closure for the mother-daughter relationship, it fails to hear Laurie's side of the story, which is not perfect either.
I wish this film emphasized the relationship between Larry and Lady Bird, as he played an influential role in keeping the family together. Regardless of my criticisms, the actors’ performances justified the film's Academy Award nominations, and I look forward to seeing what Greta Gerwig comes up with in the future.